'She's never not inebriated'

I hear in my mind, all these voices
I hear in my mind, all these words
I hear in my mind, all the music
And it breaks my heart, and it breaks my heart

I’m a total music snob. In fact, I can get pretty superior about it. I like my music at loud volumes, and once a song has me in it’s grips, I practically keep it on repeat until it’s effect wears off (driving those close to me crazy in the process).

For a little less than a year, people have been trying to get me to like Regina Spektor. I thought she was too poppy; her music bounced too much. The beginning of at least three songs sounded the same, and the “ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-heart” part of her radio single drove me crazy. And, as a general rule, I don’t like chick rock. Full stop.

Two weekends ago I was in Amsterdam, visiting my friend Colleen, and I swiped a bunch of tunes off her as I left – Kanye’s “Graduation” album that I hadn’t been bothered to get yet, Hem (“All that I’m good for” is excellent), Talib Kweli (you mean Talib, lyrics stick to your rib?), Thievery Corporation (famous for “Lebanese Blonde” on Garden State) and a new artist to me, Sia (recommend “Buttons”). And, sigh, Regina Spektor.

One of the niceities of living at my new place in central London is that I’m within walking distance of several grocery stores, a few of which are open late. For someone who can’t cook worth shit, I love grocery shopping. Anyway, I was walking down Tottenham Court Road one night to pick up a few odds and ends at Tesco. Selecting “Play all” under “Artist > Regina Spektor,” her sound and her words seeped into my brain. I flipped through all the songs once, then went back and played them again. The snobbery persisted, but was broken down slightly: a week later, I like two tracks. Only two tracks. But the two songs, ‘On the Radio’ and ‘Fidelity’ (the one I couldn’t stand) are current repeater songs on my ‘Recently Played’ playlist.

The two songs fit this playlist category of epic life moment songs., but in a particularly personal way. I don’t mean these types of cinematic songs like anything by U2; rather, these songs fit the profile of my current life soundtrack in London. Sure, everyone has songs that remind them of certain summers (Peety Pablo), people (anything White Stripes) or parties (Infernal’s Paris to Berlin). But I have a shortlist of songs right now that, if you were to make a movie about a soul-searching single girl living life in a constant mindfuck of amazing experiences, would swell up into the background, giving its audience not-so-subtle cues on how they should be feeling. It’d probably be a pretty crap film, really, but the soundtrack would be a best-seller.

1. Regina Spektor, “On the Radio” and “Fidelity”
2. Maroon 5, “Better that we break”
3. The Cinematics, “Strange Education”
4. Amp Fiddler, “Ridin” and “If I Don’t (ft. Corrine Bailey Rae)”
5. Kanye West, “Homecoming” and “Everything I Am”
6. Sara Bareilles, “Love Song” (Cripes, more chick rock)
7. The Cranberries, “Free to Decide”
8. The Raveonettes, “Black/White”
9. Marie Digby, “Paint me in your sunshine”
10. Gym Class Heroes, “Queen and I”